In 2015 we got to experience our first Katsucon, a local convention that is less than 10 miles away from where we live. After having such an amazing experience the first year we have been going back ever since and don’t plan on stopping anytime soon! Wondering if you should go to Katsucon 2018? Definitely! And here’s why-
Most of my days were spent in mental agony. I would pace back and forth, checking my phone, wondering if he was coming home or if he was even alive. There were times when he wouldn’t come home and I would find him unconscious in his truck, holding empty bottles of alcohol. Most of my days were spent in mental agony. I would pace back and forth, checking my phone, wondering if he was coming home or if he was even alive. There were times when he wouldn’t come home and I would find him unconscious in his truck, holding empty bottles of alcohol.
I would go to work and school, but nothing could distract my mind away from him. Is he okay? Will I see him today? Is he using right now? I didn’t know he was a heroin addict until I sat with him while he trembled and vomited from withdrawals. When he stabbed a man in the arm because they tried to rob him during a drug deal.
Dating him was like attending a circus. You never knew what to expect. Some days, he would bring me joy, filled with flowers and kisses. Other days, he would get drunk and I would find myself with a black eye or bruising; either physical bruising but mostly mental.
One night he called me sobbing, “Help me.” He repeated between huge gulps of air. I found out he had gotten drunk which led into a fist fight with his neighbor. He choked the man and bit off a chunk of his cheek. Another night, his mother contacted me in tears, “He left home and he’s living in his truck again. He got into another fight. He’s bleeding. I don’t know what to do.” I felt myself spinning and spiraling trying to grip onto my own sanity as I chased him everywhere, pulling him back up from whatever hell he landed himself into. From rehabilitation centers to sober living homes, I would continue helping him and loving him in any way I could. Just so he could see that there is happiness beyond a pill or empty bottle. But through loving him, I forgot to love myself.
Through these trials, I often would receive that one question, “Why did you stay with him?” And even until today, I have no answer.